A Frog in a Pot Will Boil

You may have heard the factoid about boiling a frog (please don’t try this at home)…

…if you drop a frog into boiling water it will immediately jump out of the pot.  But if you put a frog into a pot of water and slowly raise the temperature it will sit there until it’s cooked.

Why does this work?  The consistency of the water temperature slowly rising makes the frog adapt to its situation

The same is true with children. If we set consistent behavioral limits the child will adapt and maintain these rules.  It’s when parents waiver or give in that the rules of the household become blurred and the child begins to exhibit poor behavior – either out of frustration, anger, confusion or a little bit of all three.

Consistency is the Key

Consistency makes it easier for kids to learn how far they can go.  Testing boundaries is a natural part of maturing, but that doesn’t mean you have to give in.

The consistency ”tool’ is critical to any parenting plan.  Setting limits that are followed without drama and repeated battles is the glue that makes good behavior stick. Without consistency your “little frog” will quickly jump out of the proverbial pot and continue to ignore and disregard any further limits.  Once these learned-behaviors take hold they are very difficult to eradicate.

A 6 minutes and 7 seconds video clip about Children with Special Needs and the Anat Baniel Method.

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Having a special need child in the family doesn’t mean you have to panic. Just like other kids, special needs children can learn to live a normal life and reach their full potential. Guidance, teaching and love are primary ingredients in rearing a special child and helping him reach full potential.

The “panicking” of parents upon learning about their child’s situation can be attributed to some common misconceptions in dealing with special needs children. These misconceptions lead to the thought that there is no bright future for special needs children. Unless these myths are fully understood and corrected, parents will never know that special needs children will still reach their full potentials. Here are the top 3 common special child misconceptions and the truth about them:

Parenting and teaching a special child will take away all your happiness and replace it with difficulties.
This may be true to some persons who don’t love the child at all – but does this type of person exist? How can parents not love their own child no matter what his needs are? Parenting and teaching a special child is not a reason to be unhappy. It is all in the attitude! Rearing a child with special needs doesn’t take away your happiness. You may be unhappy but it’s your choice. You can choose to be happy and satisfied caring and teaching your special child. Rather than letting yourself be imprisoned by the situation, be in control. Plan exciting activities that will help you enjoy at the same time leave an effective learning experience to your child.
Special needs children will never reach their full potential.
This is another myth. Just like any other children, special needs children can reach their full potential. They can learn to speak, read, and interact with other people. They have the ability to live a happy, satisfied and complete life. But they won’t be able to achieve these on their own. They need guidance and proper teaching for them to be the best person that they could be. You should not be the judge of your child’s potential. Let him explore and learn. There are several education materials that cater to teaching special needs children reach their full potential.
Nobody understands the difficulties of parenting and teaching special needs children.
No two persons are the same. The individual difference theory is true but it doesn’t apply to situations. You may be facing the challenge of parenting or teaching differently abled children but you are not alone. Many other parents or teachers have been through the same situation. The only thing that differs is the way people handle special situations like this. There are even foundations and organizations that cater to helping parents and teachers cope up with the challenge of teaching and parenting children with special needs.
Parenting and teaching special needs children is an easy task if you know how to handle the situation. Don’t panic! Know what is true and what is not. Don’t judge a situation based on pure misconceptions. As long as you know what to do, parenting and teaching children with special needs will be a satisfying and fulfilling experience.

POPS Resources provides books, games and teaching materials for special needs and differently abled children. These teaching resources aim to help special needs children reach their full potential. For more information on how to foster the unique potential of your child, please visit POPS Special Needs Resources

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A 2 minutes and 3 seconds video clip about Why Is My Child Misbehaving Getting Attention.

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by Susan Ince

(Image Source: scientificamerican.com)As she emptied her son’s preschool cubby, Mary Robertson wept. She felt that she must be a terrible mother — why else would 5-year-old Anthony have been kicked out of school for throwing blocks while the other students raptly enjoyed story time? After his expulsion, learning experts diagnosed Anthony with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), a condition thought to affect at least one kid in every classroom. His mother, meanwhile, worked out an individualized educational plan for him so he could continue in a regular classroom and became an active member of Children With Attention-Deficit/ Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD), a national support organization.

Knowing that these kinds of problems tend to run in families, the Lexington, KY, mother feared a similar ordeal when her second child was born. Instead, daughter Samantha was so laid-back that she never even received a time-out.

Surprisingly, Samantha’s transition to school was also tough. Although she sat quietly, Samantha couldn’t focus well enough to learn or even to play with the other kids. “There I was, on the national board of CHADD, and I completely missed that my daughter also had attention issues!” exclaims Robertson.

If even this savvy mom was caught off guard, how can less informed parents know when their youngster needs help? Indeed, more and more experts are saying that the way kids with attention troubles have been identified has done American families a disservice. They’re adamant that half of all kids with these difficulties are not being diagnosed, and those like Samantha — who lack focus but don’t exhibit other behavior that attracts notice — are the most likely to slip through the cracks. (Often confusing is the clinical diagnosis for Samantha’s problem: ADHD, predominantly inattentive type. In other words, she has a hyperactivity disorder without the hyperactivity.)

The latest thinking is that lumping the two kinds of kids — the fidgety ones and the unfocused ones — together under the same diagnosis is actually preventing children like Samantha from getting the help they need.

“The problem is that the disorders sound like cousins, but the research indicates they are completely distinct and unrelated problems,” says Richard Milich, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky, Lexington, and a prominent researcher on ADHD. “(An inattention issue) may not be a behavioral but a learning or developmental disorder. We don’t know where it fits — but it’s not, as previously believed, with ADHD.”

It’s a theory that’s grabbing attention. Russell A. Barkley, Ph.D., an ADHD specialist at the University of Massachusetts Medical School at Worcester, has even proposed a new name: focused attention disorder.

Still, even as researchers dig deeper, parents and teachers often fail to recognize the condition. Here’s what you need to know.

Spotting The Struggle

Richie Whitman’s difficulties began in the third grade. When reading, he couldn’t focus on long passages. He was easily distracted, his backpack looked like a trash can, and he often forgot to hand in his homework.

“Inattentive kids are in their seats, but they’re in another world. They have to go over material three, four, five times to answer questions,” says Clare B. Jones, Ph.D., a diagnostic specialist. According to Jones, these youngsters are extremely forgetful — to the point that they can’t seem to remember to feed the dog even though it’s a daily chore or will raise their hands but forget the answer when the teacher calls on them. And, significantly, they look like daydreamers. (For more, see “Pinpointing Attention Problems.”)

Other kids may call them couch potatoes or airheads. “Some common symptoms in these children — being sluggish, lethargic, or spacey — aren’t even listed in the official diagnostic manual,” says Caryn L. Carlson, Ph.D., associate professor of psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. In the past, inattentive kids were often targeted as lazy and unmotivated. But most need a cure, not criticism.

“It’s essential that these children’s problem be diagnosed as a true impairment — not a lack of motivation — so they can be helped,” says Rosemary Tannock, Ph.D., senior scientist with the Research Institute of the Hospital for Sick Children in Toronto. That’s one reason these kids have been going unnoticed: Even caring teachers often fail to see that it’s a matter of “I can’t” rather than “I won’t.” And attention troubles are even less likely to be perceived in girls, in part because such problems are assumed to be a guy thing. “What gets a boy tested often gets a girl corrected: ‘Sit up, try harder,’” says Jones.

Growing up on Long Island, Rose Nicolosi’s* daughter Marielle* was a sweet, albeit shy, girl. But when Marielle stopped at her locker between classes, she’d lose track of time and end up needing a late pass; her grades were disappointing despite painful amounts of effort. As often happens, her attention deficit wasn’t discovered until later, when Marielle was in middle school.

“My daughter has tremendous self-esteem problems because of this disorder,” says Nicolosi. “Just having a diagnosis has been a help.”

Being blamed for behavior like Marielle’s — and riding a downward spiral of negative self-worth — is one of the most devastating effects of undiagnosed attention issues. Tammy Amoroso, a mother in Phoenix, learned that she had the disorder at the same time as her 8-year-old daughter, Ashley. Amoroso looks back on her school years with regret. “The other kids laughed at my mistakes,” she says. Her insecurities were so overwhelming that, when she finished high school, she turned down an acceptance to design school. Today, she’s getting treatment alongside her child.

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A 3 minutes and 53 seconds video clip about The Need for Consistent Parenting and Doing the Day to Day by Nick Keenan.

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