A Frog in a Pot Will Boil

You may have heard the factoid about boiling a frog (please don’t try this at home)…

…if you drop a frog into boiling water it will immediately jump out of the pot.  But if you put a frog into a pot of water and slowly raise the temperature it will sit there until it’s cooked.

Why does this work?  The consistency of the water temperature slowly rising makes the frog adapt to its situation

The same is true with children. If we set consistent behavioral limits the child will adapt and maintain these rules.  It’s when parents waiver or give in that the rules of the household become blurred and the child begins to exhibit poor behavior – either out of frustration, anger, confusion or a little bit of all three.

Consistency is the Key

Consistency makes it easier for kids to learn how far they can go.  Testing boundaries is a natural part of maturing, but that doesn’t mean you have to give in.

The consistency ”tool’ is critical to any parenting plan.  Setting limits that are followed without drama and repeated battles is the glue that makes good behavior stick. Without consistency your “little frog” will quickly jump out of the proverbial pot and continue to ignore and disregard any further limits.  Once these learned-behaviors take hold they are very difficult to eradicate.

A 1 minute and 37 seconds video clip about How to Help Kids with Short Attention Spans.

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By Ali Bierman

It is funny when you stop and notice that psychologists explain away “bad” behaviors as calls for help, attempts to get attention. They may even suggest that refusing to give the child the desired attention is the solution to that problem.

I am talking about a kid who is so desperate for love (in the guise of punishment) he is willing to act in ways he knows are undesirable just to know someone cares enough to stop him. Unfortunately parents stop the behavior because they are embarrassed or feel disempowered by an unruly child. They make it all about themselves and what others think rather than about the needs of the child – their child.

What if they helped their child gain acceptance instead? Does anyone like a child who “breaks the rules”"and behaves in ways that take attention from others? Do “troublemakers” have any friends?

Think a moment. How do your kids get your attention? Do they come to you with questions or do they “act up” when you get on the telephone? How about when you are working on a project that is unrelated to them?

Here is the thing, kids need and deserve love, especially when you least want to give it to them. That statement bears repeating. Kids need and deserve love, especially when you least want to give it to them.

You cannot possibly give a child too much love.

Tell him, “I love you.” rather than guess that he will interpret what you do as loving him. Remember, we each have our own definition of love and yours may be quite different from that of your child. Hug him lots. Remember, people need four hugs a day to survive, eight to get by, and twelve to thrive. Do you want your kid to get by or do you want your kid to thrive?

Countless studies show that actual touching, as in hugging, increases intellectual prowess in children. Want to help your kid in school? Hug him more often-much more often.

I am a retired La Leche League leader (we educate and support women who breastfeed). In La Leche League we have a saying, “You can have spoiled vegetables but you cannot have spoiled kids.” We mean paying attention to kids and loving them as opposed to over-indulging their whims.

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A 2 minutes and 25 seconds video clip about Parenting – How To Discipline Your Child Without Yelling Or Spanking.

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By Ray J Dickson

Most parents are looking for good discipline techniques. Disciplining children can be difficult. You have to make right their bad behavior, teach them the correct things to do, while also not bringing them down or creating self-delusion. You have to discover some way to discipline your child that has effect. This is not always easy to do because there are times that you are angry or frustrated and the easiest thing to do is resort to spanking or yelling.

There are better parental discipline techniques that you can use. These techniques will be far more effective than spanking or yelling. They will aid you to get your child to listen and will decrease bad behavior without belittling them or making them scared of you. You can work together to solve behavior issues and get your children to behave in an acceptable manner simply through following some easy discipline techniques.

Stay Calm

One of the main things that you need to do is step back from the situation and take time to see what is really happening. Children seldom behave badly just to upset you. They usually have some reason for their behavior. Bad behavior is almost always a reaction to something. If you can discover what that something is then you are on the right path to fixing things.

Avoid a Power Struggle

Do not make discipline about power. When you yell or spank you are simply using your power to show them they better listen to you or you will get even more upset. Parental discipline techniques should be about working together. You should be using your wisdom to guide your child to the correct behaviors.

Be Consistent

Many times a child acts out or does not respond to parental discipline techniques, it is because they are confused. They do not know what you want. They have no idea what it is that they are doing wrong or what you expect them to do. When you are using numerous discipline methods and you are shouting and carrying on, your child has no clue what to do. It is best to be consistent with everything.

Consistency includes using the same discipline methods all the time. You also need to be consistent with disciplining behavior. Don’t let your child get away with a certain behavior sometimes then suddenly start disciplining them for that same behaviour. You need to teach them that anytime they act in a particular way that they will get in trouble. Consistency also means having all adults on the same page about discipline. Any adult who is in a situation to discipline your child should be following the same techniques.

At no time do you need to scream or spank your child. Most times, these methods do not typically work too well. Better discipline techniques are to approach it calmly, avoid power struggles and above all be consistent. These three discipline techniques will be effective.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/4791400

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A 4 minutes and 23 seconds video clip about Addressing Behavior Problems in Your Child.

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See Also Parenting Articles by Dr. Randy Cale at www.TerrificParenting.com